This is my first blog contribution to the new website. A virgin contribution you might say. You might say that. But why? Why would you?
Because there comes a time in every publisher's life when they publish a book about sex.
And as Namkwan - seen here on our swanky new 'About Us' page staring totally nonchalantly in the opposite direction to that of his body - learnt, there comes a time in every Art Director's life when he or she must illustrate a book about sex using dummy characters. And placing them in all manner of positions, like the starfish, for example. Or the 'classic' 69, which I should mention, is not the classic 69 we all thought it was: cue the furrowed brows and tilted heads of Robson Press staff as we each try to figure out where we've been going wrong all these years. One member of staff, who shall remain nameless, even went so far as to say the classic 69 'was not possible'. Awkward...
Dr Pam Spurr's Sex Academy arrived in the office to much fanfare yesterday. I can honestly say, while we at Biteback and The Robson Press take great pride in the arrival of our books, I've never seen my colleagues run downstairs to pick up a delivery before.
No pick up of boxes marked Sex Academy by a group of females would be complete without a one-liner from a van man who never fails to fulfil every stereotype: "Afternoon reading, girls? Hur hur." Still, made a welcome change from "'ere you go, poppet", and a not-so-sly gawp down my top.
Back in the office everyone stood around thumbing through the pages, occasionally sniggering, to our shame. Nam, being the proper professional Art Director that he is, pulled open a page and showed it to everyone:
"This is a good spread, oh, this is the best spread."
Jess: "Please stop saying spread."
Iain: "Just saying 'spread 'em' doesn't really work does it?"
Sam: "It does for me."
As you can imagine, hilarity and endless puns ensued, you'd be forgiven for thinking we don't get out much.
Iain then tweeted: "great excitement in the @therobsonpress office as @DrPamSpurr's Sex Academy book has arrived, or come. Yes! Yes! Yes!"
Thus ensuring that none of us could look each other in the eyes for the rest of the day.
If you don't know what the mount, the rider, the starfish, the puppet, the sling (but most importantly the classic 69) etc are, then you should definitely preorder this book, priced £12.99.